An Onchan mum who lost a baby at just six weeks old has written a book to bring comfort to young children who have lost a sibling.

Sarah Owen already had five year old Alfie when, in 2016, she became pregnant again.

Sarah and her husband, Damian had talked about the impending new arrival with Alfie, who was getting very excited whilst making it clear that he wasn’t willing to share his bedroom.

Just the same sort of things that parents and youngsters talk about when their family is growing.

But this pregnancy didn’t end in the happy arrival they had all planned, as Sarah explains: ’When I went for my 20-week scan they found out that my waters had broken at some point earlier and they thought that it could be the case that the baby didn’t have any kidneys.’

Sarah was sent for specialist neonatal care at Liverpool Women’s Hospital and was admitted at 24 weeks because of the possibility of an infection setting in.

Sarah says: ’We held on for another three weeks so Arlo was born at 27 weeks and he went into the Neonatal Unit in Liverpool who were absolutely fantastic, second to none.

’He had no white blood cells and they couldn’t work out why and eventually when he got to four weeks old he was diagnosed with a condition which meant his bone marrow had gone into malfunction and was attacking itself. He was given many blood transfusions but he never had any white blood cells at all and eventually he caught an infection and he passed away when he was six weeks and one day old.’

And she adds sadly: ’With neonates it is a rollercoaster and you just don’t know what’s round the corner.’

She and Damian were able to spend time with Arlo in a special room set aside at the hospital and they gained comfort from the support offered by the Honeysuckle Trust.

The Trust continues its support through coffee mornings where mums who have lost babies can get together but there is no similar network in the island and Sarah was especially concerned about finding support for Alfie who was struggling to understand what had happened to his baby brother.

’Hospice were brilliant with Alfie. He’s seen a counsellor there and the Honeysuckle Trust gave us a book which was great initially but I just found it wasn’t comforting as a bedtime story: it was very factual and that’s great but after that I felt that was nothing there to help,’ says Sarah.

When Arlo was in the Neonatal Unit, Damian had encouraged Sarah to deal with her feelings by writing a blog.

Sarah says: ’I hadn’t thought about it but I honestly think it really helped me. The first few blogs the grammar is terrible in them because I couldn’t read it back, it was just too raw.

’Then a couple of years later I went back and edited it.

’Lots and lots of people have seen it and said it helped them and they’d identified with it.’

The idea came to Sarah for a book she could write herself for youngsters and it came to her in rhyme.

She says: ’I’ve always written poetry, certainly at school through my teenage years I wrote poetry. There’s a box of it in the attic that should probably stay hidden!’

She called the story Arlo’s Adventure. It’s charming and written in simple rhyming couplets that will really engage a young child.

But, whilst writing it came easily to Sarah, finding someone to illustrate it proved more problematic. She approached illustrators but found they needed guidance on how she saw the characters. Sarah says: ’I hadn’t visualised this story, it had just come to me in word form.’

Sarah works part-time at Onchan School as an education support officer and knew that one of the pupils, Karmen St John-Cain who has Asperger’s, had a talent for drawing.

’I was good friends with her mum Wendy who’d been a great support when Arlo was in hospital and I thought I’d ask her if Karmen would be able to do it.’

Karmen, who was 11 at the time, agreed: ’She took it up to her room and it took her about six months. I had no input: I wanted to see it through someone else’s eyes.

’When I saw them I couldn’t believe them.’

Not only were the illustrations everything Sarah could have hoped for, something strange and very heart-warming had also happened: ’On one of the pictures ’Arlo’ actually had a little bunny: it looked just like the one Arlo had when he was in hospital.’

Karmen says: ’I didn’t know Arlo had a rabbit in hospital: the idea just came to me.’

She adds: ’I find drawing makes me feel peaceful. I enjoyed putting Sarah’s words to pictures and drawing for a book that was fun. The characters just came to me as I drew them and the book didn’t really make me feel sad because I knew Arlo was at rest and not in pain.’

Her mum Wendy is delighted Karmen has been given a chance to show not just her talent but her emotions too.

She says: ’I would like to thank Sarah for remembering Karmen’s passion for drawing and allowing her free rein to create the characters. The illustrations are entirely Karmen’s creation with no direction from me.

’One of the characteristics of Asperger’s people is the inability to understand and empathise with emotions. I thinks she’s shown that people with Asperger’s are incredibly empathetic and able to show this in amazing creative ways when given the space and encouragement to express this for themselves.’

As for Sarah, she now has another little one to read Arlo’s story to: Eighteen months ago, Ava was born happy and healthy and even though she will never know him she will always have something special to remember her brother by.

â?¢ Arlo’s Adventure had its official launch at Douglas Rugby Club on Sunday. The Honeysuckle Trust has expressed an interest in using it as part of the support they offer, as has Tabitha’s Trust in the island.

The book will shortly be available at www.arlosadventure.com or contact the Arlo’s Adventure Facebook page. Sarah’s blog is at https://sarahandarlo.wordpress.com/