A doorstep vigil held across the island on Monday in memory of Sarah Everard and other women who have lost their lives to male violence has highlighted a ’need for change’, say women who took part, writes Helen McKenna.
Women of Mann [WoM], a feminist organisation that aims to ’create a safe and understanding space for debate and discussion’, organised the vigil, which asked people to stand on their doorstep or in their window with a candle or light for one minute’s silence at 9.30pm.
Hundreds of photos were shared via social media of candles being lit and lights being shone in Sarah’s and other womens’ memory.
Sarah, aged 33, was murdered after disappearing on the evening of March 3 after leaving a friend’s house to walk home in Brixton Hill, in South London.
Her death has sparked conversations around the world about how to prevent violence against women.
WoM’s Stacey Astill said: ’I think a big part of it is the fact that she [Sarah] did everything that we’re told we’re supposed to do.
’Women are socialised from quite a young age that we’re supposed to do certain things when we’re walking about and going out - she was on a main walking route, it was well-lit, she was wearing bright clothing, she’d been on the phone to her partner.
’Even though she did those things, she still ended-up being killed. And that’s horrible.
’I think that even in that case, to see people commenting and saying she shouldn’t have been walking home [alone], she shouldn’t have taken that route etc, just compounds the fact that there’s always an element of blame somewhere. I think it comes back to the rallying cry of "our streets".
’Why should women have to constantly make all of these amendments to their lives because of the fear of some kind of abuse or violence?’
A survey conducted by United Nations Women UK found that responses from women aged 18 to 24 indicated that 97% had been sexually harassed, while 80% of women of all ages said they had experienced sexual harassment in public spaces.
Many notable women took part in the vigil, including Manx politicians Clare Barber MHK and Kerry Sharpe MLC.
Mrs Barber suggested to light a candle or shine a light in windows on Saturday to show solidarity for the Reclaim These Streets campaign, which was the vigil organised on Clapham Common on Saturday in Sarah’s memory.
The campaign stated on its website: ’This is a vigil for Sarah, but also for all women who feel unsafe, who go missing from our streets and who face violence every day.’
Mrs Barber said: ’I think we all can talk of a time that we felt uncomfortable walking home, whether that be on island or other geographical locations.
’I think it’s right to say that it’s not just exclusive to women, but there is evidence that it’s a large proportion of women that [violence] happens to on their way home. I think this is something that everyone can feel.
’We need to look at how we can make our streets safer, and while we recognise that [Manx] streets are safer than most inner city locations, we really need to get to a position where everyone can walk freely and feel safe both during the day, at night, whenever.’
Mrs Barber said she feels that Sarah’s murder has started conversations about violence against women because other women can relate to similar situations.
She said: ’Sarah Everard isn’t the only woman who’s been in this situation and isn’t the only victim. There’s been many and it shouldn’t be that things come down to one case that really triggers people into action.
’It’s that ability to put yourself into someone’s shoes and think that it could have happened to you.’
Kerry Sharpe MLC also took part in Monday night’s vigil.
She said: ’I’m taking part in the vigil because women have had enough - I have had enough - of the fact that women still cannot walk where they want, when they want without the possibility of being raped and murdered.
’I had to explain to my two girls why I was lighting candles outside our front door. It makes me sad and angry that I am even having the conversation.’
Mrs Sharpe continued: ’When I took part in my first Reclaim the Night march as a student in 1989, I was marching so that my daughters, if I ever had any, would be able to walk on their own without fear. We are now thirty years later and Sarah Everard has been killed simply for walking home.
’There are a number of factors, I think, which have led to the killing of Sarah Everard prompting a global vigil. Social media is more ubiquitous than it has ever been which means suddenly women across the world can react to a situation and find strength in numbers.
’The pandemic has created a hothouse of emotions in most people’s homes. For some, life is more peaceful but in others, domestic abuse has increased massively. People also have time to do more reflecting about what is and is not important in life - what they’re prepared to put up with and what they most definitely are not.’
Mrs Sharpe travelled for a time on her own throughout South America, Africa, Japan, China, Thailand and Central America, and while she said she felt safe the majority of the time, she has experienced assault and harassment in other areas such as London and Cuba.
’As far as the vigil is concerned, it’s just as important to hold it here in the Isle of Man, even though we have a much lower crime rate than in the UK.’
She said it was easy to forget that women do still get attacked in our island and a woman from here was just as likely to be attacked when travelling or living elsewhere as any other woman.
Se added: ’While I didn’t tell my daughters about these incidents, I did tell them that, in general, I have travelled on my own throughout other countries and I have walked alone a million times, in the day time and at night and I have felt perfectly confident and been perfectly safe. It’s important to remember that on the whole, I always tell them, the world is mostly filled with good people.
’There are only a few you have to look out for. But what they didn’t realise, until tonight, is that because they are girls, they have to be extra vigilant. Whilst it’s true that men also get attacked walking alone, they don’t usually end up raped and murdered.
’I have the opportunity as a member of Tynwald, as a member of the Commonwealth, as a member of the human race, to work with colleagues and with women world-wide, and I will do all I can to change this situation. If we do that world-wide, if we keep the pressure on, we will see change.’